the kids

there are equally funny, lovely, cutesy, wonderful moments as well as rebellious, mischievous, frustrated, and baffling moments.

i understand.
they don't realize what they're doing is wrong or right.
they are testing the waters, the boundaries.
they are trying to have fun in a predictable, boring environment.
they are trying to get attention.
they are deliberately provoking you just to satisfy their curiosity, sense of humour.
they are experimenting with action and reaction.

sometimes, i forget that they are just growing up themselves. just like i was growing up when i was a kid. doing all those things for whatever reasons that are valid as a growing child.

after so many months of teaching, i have forgotten that i am here to nurture and educate.
what happened to fun and realistic learning environment?
what happened to influencing the family?
what happened to being their friend as much as possible?
what happened to enjoying the kids and having fun with them?

i'm now caught up in the job. the stress. the demand. the frustration. the disappointment. the unnecessary dramas.
so much so that i have become more like the teachers i dislike than the educator i want to be.
patience-well running dry. more easy-trigger buttons installed. reasonable thinking path short-circuited.

can't wait till the holidays start. i need to recharge badly.